I Write About the Grief Nobody Talks About

For the ones quietly grieving someone who's still here.

Every Tuesday, I publish essays about anticipatory grief—the grief of losing someone while they're still alive. The grief of watching someone fade. The grief that happens in the middle of goodbye.

Read them on Substack, or subscribe below to get them in your inbox.

This isn't clinical advice.

It's peer support from someone who's lived it.

Read on Substack

Hi, I'm Heidi.

I've lived through anticipatory grief in many forms—aging parents, shifting relationships, and even the quiet losses we don't always talk about.

I created the REAL Method—Recognize, Embrace, Align, Live—to hold what most people never acknowledge: the quiet pain of showing up every day while slowly letting go.

This isn't therapy.

It's peer-based support. A place to be real about what's hard, without needing to explain or justify it.

THE REAL METHOD

RECOGNIZE

Before healing begins, truth must be named. Not the polished version you show others—what's actually happening inside you.

EMBRACE

Your emotions aren't wrong or too much. This is where you give yourself permission to feel what you feel without judgment.

ALIGN

Alignment means coming home to yourself. Not perfect decisions—honest ones that honor your capacity and humanity.

LIVE

Life doesn't pause for grief. This means showing up while staying connected to yourself, even when everything is shifting.

What I'm Building

I create resources for people navigating anticipatory grief — the grief of losing someone who is still here. The grief that shows up before goodbye. The grief nobody talks about.

Everything I make is grounded in The REAL Process — Recognize, Embrace, Align, Live. It isn't therapy. It's peer support from someone who has lived it.
Here's what's available right now.

Holding Both:

A Workshop for Caregivers in the Middle of Goodbye

Sunday, April 12 · 11am PST / 2pm EST · 75 minutes · $37

You are allowed to feel everything you are feeling. The exhaustion and the love. The grief and the gratitude. The wish for it to be over and the terror of that wish.

This 75-minute live workshop is for the working daughter, the tired caregiver, the person holding more than anyone can see. We will name what's happening, work through the both/and of it, and find one small step forward.

Replay available for 7 days.

You deserve this space. Don't wait.